
Digital Addiction
by Tom Fasulo

Sure, I did computer games.  Hey, most of my generation did!  But I
was always in control.  Not like some others.  Anyway, the hand-and-
eye coordination games bored me.  And I quickly lost interest in the
kind of games where you try to get the hero off the Earth before the
Vogons destroyed it.  I mean I could take them or leave them. Like I
just did them, you know, to be in.

Well, there was one game I kinda had a problem with. It's called
Solitile, a kind of mahjong.  I'd do two or three games of it a day.
But it only had a few variations in layouts.  After awhile it also
got boring.  Even when I'd win, the rush wasn't there anymore.  So I
stopped. 

Things were going real well for me. I had a nice house, a good job
with the university, and a dog that loved me.  When I'd come home at
nights we'd go for long walks and talk about software upgrades. 

Then one day Greg "The SySop," a local game pusher, turned me on to
Mjvga.  It was like another kind of mahjong.  Sure, it only had one
layout, but there were *thirty* different tile sets!  And it kept
track of your winning scores too, man.  "The SySop" even told me I  
could even try it out for free as it was shareware.  So I did.  No 
problem, right?  Like I said, I was always in control before.

At first I'd only do it at home, and it was great!.  I had never done
a game like this before.  Soon I couldn't wait to get home and do a
couple of sets before dinner.  And after dinner too!  Before long I 
stopped taking my dog on walks as I was doing Mjvga all the time at
home.  He'd sit out on the porch and wonder where I was, but I didn't
care.  I'd stay up late too.  After awhile the people at the office 
noticed how tired I was, the circles under my eyes, and the dazed
look I had.  They asked me if there was anything wrong, but I told
them to mind their own business.  And Mjvga wasn't free anymore!  I
had to pay the registration fee as I was using it all the time now.
But it was worth it for the good feeling it gave me.

Then I even started doing Mjvga at the office.  I'd shut the door and
do a couple sets of tiles to unwind.  Then I was doing sets of tiles
most of the day. I wasn't getting any work done.  Things were out of
control.  I was in trouble! 

Then my dog had a long talk with me.  I broke down and told him
everything.  He said he'd help me through the withdrawal and give me
the support I needed.  So I deleted Mjvga on my computer at home, but
like most addicts I cheated.  I zipped it up on my computer at the 
office and kept it hidden in an out-of-the-way subdirectory.

Anyway, I didn't do tiles anymore.  My dog and I went for long walks
again.  Things got better at work too.  I started getting papers
accepted by national journals and conferences.  Grant money started 
coming in.  Life was good again.

Then one weekend I visited some friends down state.  I thought the
guy and his wife were straight, but it turned out they were heavy in
Mjvga.  They had *one hundred* and *twenty-seven* different tile
sets.  So just to be sociable I tried a couple of the sets.  After
all, it was only for the weekend.  Soon I'd return to my normal
routine.  Sure man!  Sure!  When I went home, I took the 127 tile
sets with me. 

Now I'm into Mjvga heavier then ever.  I do it at home and at work.
Seems all I ever do is think about my next set of tiles.  And my dog
is stuck on the back porch again.  To sort of justify what I do, I 
even uploaded all the tile sets to the local BBSs.  I figured that if
others were doing it then maybe I wasn't doing anything wrong.  Now
other people are hooked because of me.

Because I'm a distributor now I'm getting the kind of attention I
don't want.  I think the computer game police have my modem tapped. 
And the last few days there's been someone in a car across the street
watching my house.  Oh, God! I need help.

God?  God?  Hey, wait a minute!  Mjvga has several tile sets with a
religious theme.  Praise the Lord! 

So, come brethren!  Come to my house next Sunday and worship with
Pastor Tom at the First Church of the Holy Tiles.  And bring a mouse.
Saint Mjvga requires it.                                        {RAH}
--------------
Tom Fasulo is a 46 year-old entomologist with the University of
Florida, whose job it is to develop truly buggy software.  He can be
reached at: fasulo@gnv.ifas.ufl.edu
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Lillehammer Moment:

(just after Dan Jansen slipped in the 500m speed skating event)

Idiotic American TV Reporter:  "Is there anything wrong with the
       ice?  It seems really slippery."

Dan Jansen's Coach:  "Ice is always slippery."

