# Familial Murder

Category: Let's talk

## Post 1 by Goblin (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Monday, 06-Nov-2006 8:58:30

Rebecca Lewis has been convicted of the new crime of Familial Murder, for failing to stop her violent boyfriend, from abusing and killing, her 14 month old son. If found guilty she could serve 14 years in jail. The crime of Familial Murder, came in to force under the Domestic Violence at Home act in 2004. Should mothers ect, who have lost children to violent partners, be held accountable for failing to prevent their child being killed or left terribly injured
{brain damaged ect }.

## Post 2 by Musical Ambition (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Monday, 06-Nov-2006 9:26:06

Of course they should. That is, if they knew what was going on. If they didnt' know what was going on, then, I dont' think that someone could be blamed. However, if the mother, father, or anyone else, knew that a child was being abused, etc., then, yes, I think that that person plays a part it what's going on, and if they choose to do nothing about it, then their definitely putting those children, and themselves, at great risk. Now, I do understand that getting out of a violent relationship, or being an outsider, looking in on one, and trying to do something about it, is not an easy thing, but you have to try to be strong enough to do what you need to do. This reminds me of another story that happened here. A few weeks ago, we took a trip to go visit my sister, brother in law, and their newborn baby. Well, while we were there, my sister told us a story that she saw on the news. She said that some woman got mad at her boyfriend, and used their one month old baby, as a weapon against him. She got mad, picked up the infant, swung and hit her boyfriend with it, as if the baby were a club. I'm not sure if the baby died, but I do know that it ended up with a cracked skull. That's such a shame, and I hope something is done about it.

## Post 3 by Raskolnikov (I'll have the last word, thank you!) on Monday, 06-Nov-2006 10:20:18

The age of the mother would probably have to be considered. If she was a teenager, and if she herself was being abused, then perhaps she herself was frightened out of her mind. That's how it is with victims of abuse, the bastards can go on for years being monsters physically, psychologically, and verbally and the truth is made known only until it's already too late.

## Post 4 by Musical Ambition (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Monday, 06-Nov-2006 10:21:41

That's very true. It's sucha sad thing.

## Post 5 by Grace (I've now got the ggold prolific poster award! wahoo! well done to me!) on Monday, 06-Nov-2006 11:07:30

Its a D*amned cycle that needs desperately to be busted to a shriveling of ashes fit for the urn of despair. That's my personal opinion.
Connie ~ Grace

## Post 6 by Senior (I've now got the bronze prolific poster award! now going for the silver award!) on Monday, 06-Nov-2006 11:33:28

If you know that a crime is being committed, and you don't report it, it doesn't matter what the crime is, you're as guilty as the person committing it so you should be punished with equal harshness.

## Post 7 by Perestroika (Her Swissness) on Tuesday, 07-Nov-2006 4:44:06

I think, barring any circumstances that would have perhaps been considered abuse itself, such as emotional or physical abuse like the example sighted above, that that person should deffinitly be convicted of a crime.
There are a lot of people out there who need to take better care of their children. This viscious circle i have seen all too many times, and usually it's too far gone to stop it, the time to act is when your child is still a child, not when they are in their teens.
Unfortunately, it's a difficult situation, so many times i've heard of husbands treating their wives as emotional and physical punching bags and a lot of the time they are so emotionally abused and frightened that sometimes these things happen and there is not a thing they can do. often this is the case with domestic violence against themselves, but unfortunately in this case it could be slightly different.
I believe it depends on why she didn't interfeer, look at it this way, if she had interfeered, she may well have ended up dead herself, is that really better?
I believe this is a clear message to all, that more people should be on the lookout for domestic violence, weather or not it is your business, if you report insodences such as this, you may well save lives.

## Post 8 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Tuesday, 07-Nov-2006 8:17:21

it's tricky. predominantly because the violent partner will often tell the mother that if they report the crime then social services will come in and she will be charged with the crime and not the perpitrator of it. And usually these women have no self worth and believe everything said partner tells them. I personally wouldn't stay with someone who lifted a hand to me, and if he lifted a hand to my child his life wouldn't be worth living, but not all women are that strong.

## Post 9 by Musical Ambition (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Tuesday, 07-Nov-2006 9:01:38

I agree with the last two posts. It's definitely a tricky and hard situation. I also agree with what Galileo said. If more people would take the time to report abuse, then so many things could change. Lives could be saved. But, there's so many out there, who much rather turn and ignore it. Maybe this is out of fear, I don't know. But, so many things can be done anonymously. At least that's the way it is here in the US. I'm not sure if that's the case in other countries, but hopefully it is.

## Post 10 by Perestroika (Her Swissness) on Wednesday, 08-Nov-2006 8:27:32

i think it is also to do with it being taught that you stay out of others business, however, when a child is involved, it should be your business to make it your business.

## Post 11 by Goblin (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Wednesday, 08-Nov-2006 8:52:52

Its all well and good to state that people should be more vigilant in looking for signs of abuse, but as Galileo well knows abusers lead double lives, a woman on the Radio 4 programme covering this issue said and I quote.I have seen a man, terrify a woman, simply by gazing at her from across a courtroom. Faced with that level of fear and intimidation what would you have her do,when she's mentally and physically paralysed by absolute fear.

## Post 12 by Raskolnikov (I'll have the last word, thank you!) on Wednesday, 08-Nov-2006 9:21:06

If looks could kill!

## Post 13 by Perestroika (Her Swissness) on Wednesday, 08-Nov-2006 9:55:00

Goblin, i believe that woman is correct, and it is a truely sad world we live in, has domestic violence simply become too comon.
Is it also something that is tabooed? so that women who suffer can't talk about it? fear is truely an interesting emotion.

## Post 14 by blbobby (Ooo you're gona like this!) on Wednesday, 08-Nov-2006 20:16:10

I agree with everything that's been said here concerning abuse, but, do we need a new law? What's wrong with accessory to murder. Seems like that would get her more than fourteen years.
I just think we already have too many laws.
Bob

## Post 15 by Goblin (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Thursday, 09-Nov-2006 9:08:27

The subject is no longer taboo and hasn't been so for a number of years, the women who dont speak out do so due to fear of reprisals, which sadly, may result in her death, or the deaths of her children. Blobby you have a point though there are 2 sides to every story.
In this case I would only jail the mothers, and I use the word very loosely, who stand idly by while their partner batters their children, and do nothing to stop him, or make endless excuses for his appalling behaviour.

## Post 16 by Musical Ambition (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Thursday, 09-Nov-2006 9:12:01

You would only jail the mothers for standing by idly, while their partners abused their children, but you wouldn't jail the abuser? That doesn't seem right to me, at all.

## Post 17 by Goblin (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Thursday, 09-Nov-2006 9:34:53

Ach You are quick to nit pick aren't you eh? little miss perfect? if only. Of course I'd jail him, in a woman's prison, with psychpathic headacases, who would rip him to shreds. Are you happy now hmm?

## Post 18 by Musical Ambition (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Thursday, 09-Nov-2006 9:44:08

There is absolutley no need for you to start calling people names, just because they ask a simple question. Is that so wrong to do? You clearly stated, and I quote, "In this case I would only jail the mothers, and I use the word very loosely, who stand idly by while their partner batters their children, and do nothing
to stop him, or make endless excuses for his appalling behaviour." To me, that sounded like you were saying that only the mother should be punished, and not the actual abuser. I was just asking a simple question, that's all.

## Post 19 by Blue Velvet (I've got the platinum golden silver bronze poster award.) on Thursday, 09-Nov-2006 10:32:29

This whole issue is so hard to deal with. On one hand, yes I would jail the mothers who let their husbands or boyfriends abuse their children. On the other hand, I can understand how fear can paralyze them. But I get so sick of stories on our local TV channels where the mother of some dead or seriously injured baby cries on TV and talks about how she didn't know what was happening. I want to scream, "How the hell could you not know?" It seems to be today so many parents shouldn't be parents. They don't pay any attention to what is going on in their own home. If I were even the least bit suspicious that a boyfriend had touched my baby inappropriately, I'd get rid of that man.

## Post 20 by Grace (I've now got the ggold prolific poster award! wahoo! well done to me!) on Thursday, 09-Nov-2006 10:50:59

...A Question re: Post #18, What about the statement of Post #17... Do You REALLY think for a moment the b*st*rd would be allowed into a WOMEN's Prison...??? eh... Hmmm... maybe so if some surgical transformations were performed so as to render the male into say one of female persuasion... Maybe add in a few hormone treatments for "good measure"..?? You know, or maybe not so... Like on Jerry Springer-Spaniel Show where one sex transforms into another...??? (and audience asked to **guess** WHO is Male and WHO is Female
...Personal thots are that the abused infants/babies/toddlers/children, at least in many areas United States, well, situations of abuse are referred from say Physicians/Hospital Emergency Rooms into the Court System and placed oft times in Foster Care (Child Protective Services) &/or another relative's home with Court Appointed Supervision while the various Court Cases are pending in the what is considered to be abuse/negligent
*all this d*mn pain...it s*cks in the worst way possible.. deprivation at it's most ugly state.
Connie ~ Grace

## Post 21 by blbobby (Ooo you're gona like this!) on Friday, 10-Nov-2006 5:28:24

what about other children in the home. Often, one child is singled out for abuse and the whole family participates.
When is a person truly his/her brother's keeper?
Bob

## Post 22 by Goblin (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Friday, 10-Nov-2006 7:44:14

Gemini that was a typo haven't you ever made a mistake, no I forgot your perfect eh? aye if only in your own mind. Bob I agree and sadly I have seen the effects of this. It's usually a collective deliberate sustained attack by the parents who are often insecure, inadequate creatures, who need secure unwavering support from the preferred sibling;In order to destroy the victim.
Tragically in order to thrive amid the abuse and distress the preferred sibling will join in on the abuse and usurp their position to lethal effect.

## Post 23 by Perestroika (Her Swissness) on Friday, 10-Nov-2006 19:01:57

i think the issue is is that parents are allowed to be far too free with parenting and so on, perhaps more monitering is needed?

## Post 24 by blbobby (Ooo you're gona like this!) on Friday, 10-Nov-2006 22:43:40

Galileo, I sure hope government in my face is not the answer. But, it's really a tough question. I agree with Goblin that the parents too have problems which bring about abusive situations. That's the problem with seeing more than one side of a conversation. It makes workable solutions so much more difficult.
But, I think we can all agree that as soon as is possible the child/children should be taken out of the home for their own protection. Then, we have the question, when should they be let back in? or should they?
Bob
Bob

## Post 25 by Grace (I've now got the ggold prolific poster award! wahoo! well done to me!) on Saturday, 11-Nov-2006 4:32:42

...say WHAT?!?! Galileo...
By the way, I note your profile/Written states you are from Blue Mountains Australia...[I never been there though the name sounds like a lovely place to visit]
You say you want to effect or at least my take on it all that you want for GOVERNMENTAL CONTROLS...like as in a DICTATORSHIP or of the similar... regarding Parents and their Children...??
Realizing we are vast worlds apart, in a manner of speaking, yet still this is difficulity in personal understanding...
Personal thots are though that some couples have children while as of yet in their own style of living they are kidds themselves and not readied to take on the responsibilities..
Might be well if in High School there were like Daily Living Type of Classes with say at very least say 600 hours of classroom study regarding FAMILY LIFE/RESPONSIBILITIES before being allowed to become Parents... sounds a bit harsh perhaps... **Maybe not harsh enough..???
Galileo, please share your thots if you so desire.. Personally I am in a process of sorting through personal thots and just leaving these like personal first thots here as a means to continue this worthwhile discussion with you Galileo and others who are of capable understanding... so much is at steak to consider... Life you know.
[Gentle *hugs*]
Sincerely, Connie ~ Grace