# creation explained

Category: Joke Board

## Post 1 by shark (the zone's favorite, Canadian Great White) on Wednesday, 01-Aug-2007 0:26:28

the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach,
green
and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long
and healthy lives.
Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben
and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want
chocolate with that?"
And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as
long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And
Satan smiled.
And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman
might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white
flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman
went
from size 6 to size 14.
So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And
Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast
on
the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy
vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth
deep
fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man
gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof..
God then created a light, fluffy white cake,
named it "Angel Food Cake," and said, "It is good." Satan then created
chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food."
God then brought forth running shoes so that
His children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a
remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man
and
Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally
low in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful
skin
and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained
pounds.
God then gave lean beef so that Man might
consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created
McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries
with
that?" And Man replied, "Yes! And super size them!" And Satan said, "It is
good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed and created quadruple bypass
surgery.
Then Satan created HMOs.

## Post 2 by blbobby (Ooo you're gona like this!) on Wednesday, 01-Aug-2007 18:02:28

&LT;lol> very good.
I think that is exactly what happened. That's why they call it an expanding universe.
Bob