# age difference

Category: Dating and Relationships

## Post 1 by Runner229 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Wednesday, 18-Jul-2012 11:41:38

What are your limits for dating when it comes to age? I recently heard that an 18 year old girl was dating a man in his 60's and I was in shock. Personally I would not date someone way older or younger. I wouldn't mind dating someone a few years older than me but since I'm young I wouldn't date someone much younger.

## Post 2 by forereel (Just posting.) on Wednesday, 18-Jul-2012 12:19:40

18 is legal, but draws the issue of taking her places.
For me 21 if she is really easy, but mainly about 25 and up. I find that young or older doesn't really matter when it comes to maturity,how willing a woman is to experience things, or how exciting she will be as far as keeping herself in good shape or condition.
Many men assume that if a woman is younger she'll be more active sexually, and physically, and mentally, but that, in my experience has not been the case at all.
I suppose it depends on the person for me.

## Post 3 by LeoGuardian (You mean there is something outside of this room with my computer in it?) on Wednesday, 18-Jul-2012 12:38:59

We look at older men dating younger women as dirty, and on the other hand we look at older women dating younger men as kind of mysterious, interesting, and enlightened.
Blah to double standards.
In reality the problems are more what stage of life you're at and how compatible they are. So someone getting ready to become an empty nester may or may not be compatible with someone much younger, but if that person wants to start a family and all, you may be quite disappointed. In reality age isn't just a number: You who are 25 are in a very different place physically and mentally than someone who is 18 and just moving out of the house, not yet been to college, etc. Doesn't mean incompatible, just means you have to think about these things. I am personally loath to interfere with or 'disapprove of' someone else's business, provided the two are consenting adults. I find that to be very little-girlish behavior, good luck with the pigtails.

## Post 4 by metal angel (Help me, I'm stuck to my chair!) on Wednesday, 18-Jul-2012 17:36:58

I agree with post 3.
For me i'd say 21 to 30, but it all depends on the maturity of the person and where there at in life.

## Post 5 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Thursday, 19-Jul-2012 15:10:09

Age isn't just a number; I have come to accept that, but the number isn't everything, either. Age does place some limits on people. It is kind of difficult to move out and go to college before 18, but there do exist 30 and 40 year old kids; and by kids, I mean they have yet to figure out where they're going, and how they're getting there. I've found, for the most part, that the larger the number, the more diverse the group. At 16, just about everyone is in high school, living with either a parent or a guardian, with very few exceptions. this isn't to say they're not mature; just that their experience is limited to the high school, living under someone else's roof life. At 18, some people are still trying to sort out their life, while others are already adjusting to the college or worklife, and the freedoms and responsibilities that come with living either under your own roof, or sharing one on equal grounds with someone. So although the paths tend to fork a little at this age, most of them do have one thing in common: they're fresh out of high school. The 21-25 age range is when things start to get more diverse. My point here isn't to map out everyone's possible life plan, so I'll stop there. But I think you get my point. I'm not against any age difference where both partners are aware of what they are consenting to, but the older the prospective partner, the less you can find out about them from their age alone.

## Post 6 by metal angel (Help me, I'm stuck to my chair!) on Thursday, 19-Jul-2012 22:22:17

well said ocean, nicely put.

## Post 7 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Friday, 20-Jul-2012 7:59:43

I think that with anything else age needs some consideration. It's not necessarily about experience, as everyone is different, but the longer term implications are some that should be considered.
For instance, if an eighteen year old is going to marry a sixty year old, then he/she is likely to be a widdow before the age of 40. If he/she wants children it is likely that the sixty year old either won't be able to or won't want to be a parent at that age.
I do agree with Leo that as long as all parties are consenting then it really is none of anyone else's business.

## Post 8 by musicgirl (Veteran Zoner) on Friday, 20-Jul-2012 22:35:35

Surprisingly enough, some extreme cases have worked out. I know a dear couple that's been married for over 30 years, and they are 23 years apart. When they married the girl was 18 and the guy was 41 and divorced with two kids. Now they've got 5 kids of their own and have a strong marriage. but then there are cases like that of my father's who got with a girl 20 years younger and moved her into the house. She was just about as mature as a 15-year-old so they were only together for 3 or so years before she packed up and got the hell out because she wasn't getting every little thing she wanted out of him. And i know it's really between the couple, and to each their own, but I still shudder at the thought that I have a half sister from a girl that was only 5 years old when I was born...

## Post 9 by Runner229 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Saturday, 21-Jul-2012 1:17:14

That does sound crazy, but if it works out...

## Post 10 by Jack Off Jill (why the hell am I posting in the first place?) on Sunday, 22-Jul-2012 23:07:39

well personally age doesn't matter in some cases. I don't think 18 and 60 is a good thing and I wouldn't prefer it because of child reasons and well
he'll be on his death bed soon anyways
but if that person was like 10 or a tad bit older in years. I don't see anything wrong
so long as both partners are happy with one another

## Post 11 by Agent r08 (Jesus Christ on a chocolate cross) on Tuesday, 24-Jul-2012 20:43:33

My Dad was 20 years older then my mom and they were together for a good 17 or so years. After the divorce my mom met a guy whom she dated for 12 years who was 10 years younger then her.
Age to me isn't the most important thing. I look first and foremost at a persons maturity level and go from there. If that means the person is 18, 20 or even 30 then so be it.

## Post 12 by Winterfresh (This is who I am, an what I am about. If you don't like it, too damn bad!!!) on Wednesday, 25-Jul-2012 20:36:49

I feel like, if both parties conscent and know what they're in for and are ready to jump into this crazy thing we call love, then go for it! Age isn't the first thing I look at either, especially since my best friend and I have a significant age gap. 18 and 60 may be a little extreme in my opinion, but if it works out, then that's wonderful!!!

## Post 13 by Dentin (Veteran Zoner) on Monday, 30-Jul-2012 12:51:05

As a guy, I've always felt that the range was between 60% of my age and about 120% of my age, with a lower limit of about 20. Most of the girls I know have a different range they feel is acceptable.

## Post 14 by bluebottle (Newborn Zoner) on Thursday, 02-Aug-2012 17:43:31

I don't care about age gaps as long both parties are over 18 and it's consensual. However, I've been told there's a socially acceptable formula as to what the youngest age you can date is, which would be: your age divided by two, plus 7. In my case, I am 22 and the youngest age I could date according to this ridinkydonk formula, is 18.
I actually showed interest guy who was quite obviously interested in me, as he wasn't very shy about it, about 4 or 5 months ago, but eventually he withdrew because he said I was too young.
He was 8 years older than me. It still bothers me a little.

## Post 15 by Jack Off Jill (why the hell am I posting in the first place?) on Thursday, 02-Aug-2012 20:02:58

well the eight year difference I see no problem with. in fact none waht so ever

## Post 16 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Friday, 03-Aug-2012 12:55:40

8 year difference? Personally I wouldn't do that. I guess at this stage of my life I'd go out with about age 26-30. I'd say age 30 might be pushing it. As I write this I am realizing how narrow-minded I am on this issue but I do feel that age is not just a number.

## Post 17 by forereel (Just posting.) on Friday, 03-Aug-2012 14:49:48

7

## Post 18 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Friday, 03-Aug-2012 15:44:39

margorp, I feel it's definitely narrow-minded to say you'll only date from ages 26-30. it's your life, after all, but I feel it's important that the point be made that older age doesn't mean someone is more mature. we all have varying degrees of life experience, regardless of how old we are, which, I believe, also plays a part in how mature one is or isn't.

## Post 19 by Agent r08 (Jesus Christ on a chocolate cross) on Friday, 03-Aug-2012 17:23:33

To post 14.
8 years is nothing. My ex was about 10 years younger then me.
To post 16.
You're missing out on a lot of opportunities due to limiting yourself so much on age.

## Post 20 by illumination (Darkness is history.) on Friday, 03-Aug-2012 20:32:55

My grandmother is married to somebody who is 12 years younger than she is. So marrying someone witha large age difference isn't necessarily a bad thing. However, I do feel that an 18-year-old dating a 60-year-old is a bit extreme. At one point, I was dating a girl who was about 4 and half years older than I am, and I was very comfortable with that. Age is, after all, just a number, and the maturity level is what sets the stage for everything.

## Post 21 by Godzilla-On-Toast (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Saturday, 04-Aug-2012 14:18:17

I was never really aware of society's ideas about age differences between romantic partners. But most of my life I've been attracted to women around my age. However, let's see, my first serious relationship was with somebody nine years younger than I was, but I don't think we broke up due to that age difference as much as she was just too damn needy for me. The relationship I'm in now is with a woman five years older than I am and I couldn't be happier. We joke about it, saying I'm robbing the cradle and she says that try as I might I'll never catch up to her.
I know when I was at the school for the blind, I liked this girl that was a year or two younger than I am and I think these several guys that didn't like me were trying to convince her that she was too young. As I think of it now, I wonder if the real issue was that I was totally blind and this girl and these several guys were partially sighted, and I guess when you're teenagers at a school for the blind this is supposed to be very important. LOL!

## Post 22 by LeoGuardian (You mean there is something outside of this room with my computer in it?) on Saturday, 04-Aug-2012 15:48:55

Well age isn't just a number, but one has to consider life stages. If you're looking to settle down, you don't want to be with someone who is only interested in bar hopping.
Age isn't just a number: as years go by, no matter how good you are at working out and all of that, you don't have the same energy level as the young spastic hyper you want to date. So while the older one may be comfortable with things, the younger one may be starting to feel confined or like you're just "not withi iit," simply because biology will take its course one way or the other.
My wife is four and a half years older than I am, which by any stretch is really not that much. However, because of the time periods when she was growing up and when I was, well, there are things we've had to work through especially as it comes to raising kids. The world of the late 70s and early 80s was quite different for teens than the world of the mid to late 80s. Not many years, but a lot of changes in difference. Those are all cultural constraints to be aware of, not necessarily shy away from. But whether it's culture, energy level, expections or anything else, either the narrowminded perspective, or the "age is just a number" type plattitudes doesn't really help very much.

## Post 23 by Lisa's Girl forever (Help me, I'm stuck to my chair!) on Saturday, 11-Aug-2012 8:20:34

my fiancie and i are only 4 years a part. and we are currently happily. together. it don't matter to me.

## Post 24 by Westcoastcdngrl (move over school!) on Sunday, 12-Aug-2012 2:46:43

I'd always had an unwritten "5 year max" rule when considering people to date... i.e. I wouldn't normally go out with anybody more than 5 years younger or 5 years older.
It's a good thing I didn't actually stick to this "rule' or else I wouldn't be getting married... The Other Half (my fiancé) is 9 years younger than myself.

## Post 25 by forereel (Just posting.) on Sunday, 12-Aug-2012 18:39:12

Leo. I have known older women who are full of energy, and women that are young and suppose to be full of energy, sexually, and all old ladies.
You can't know a persons health condition, because people die at all ages. I know some young women who are on a pile of medications.
As I said in my early post the person is what makes the relationship work. Every one must age, but age or lack of it doesn't mean you have to keep yourself from enjoying what is good to you at the time it is. Maybe you are 21 now, but you have no promise of making it to 25. On the other hand you could be 60 and continue to healthy and full of energy until you're 80. That give a relationship 20 years of love no matter how old the other person was.

## Post 26 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 13-Aug-2012 8:42:21

it's just really not that straightforward though is it?
because age difference has an impact based on where in life you are.
If you're say, over 25, then an eight year age difference isn't that big a deal, but if you're sixteen then it makes a massive difference.
If I had a sixteen year old, or even an eighteen year old, wanting to go out with someone eight years older I would wonder why someone that much older would be interested in someone so young, and no, I wouldn't welcome the idea with open arms.

## Post 27 by forereel (Just posting.) on Monday, 13-Aug-2012 13:33:41

I suppose that again is a society ruling. In some countries or cultures people are thought to be adults at about age 13.
This rule seems mostly to apply to girls, being that a girl, or woman can marry any age she wishes after she is thought of as adult, and it is not odd for a 15 or 16 year old girl to be connected with a man as much as 20 or more years her senior.
I suppose this question really depends on the place, time, people, and reasons.
I personally would not allow a 15 year old to get involved seriously with anyone no matter his age or her age, but I suppose after adulthood, about 18 to 21 they can do as they think best.

## Post 28 by TechnologyUser2012 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Monday, 13-Aug-2012 20:51:53

i wouldn't mind dating someone 10 years older than me. but probably not older than that. I'm not too crazy about the idea of dating someone younger than me, but I guess it depends on the individual's maturity and personality.

## Post 29 by CSection (Out standing in my field.) on Wednesday, 22-Aug-2012 9:07:52

If the first thing your concerned about when choosing a potential partenr is their age then you are already narrowing your options significantly. Yes we tend to find people our own age atractive, and a lot of that is because our aspirations and interests match up. But real love doesn't have rules, and age really can be just a number. I know teenagers that act like they are middle aged and the reverse. I'm 25, and I feel that is unlikely that many girls around 18 will share my interests. But it is certainly not impossible.
Like all aspects of dating, common sense is a must. But if you meet somebody who is either a lot older or a lot younger...over 16 of course, but you still feel you have a connection and shared interests and goals, then why push away a possible opportunity just because of a number.

## Post 30 by Siriusly Severus (The ESTJ 1w9 3w4 6w7 The Taskmaste) on Friday, 24-Aug-2012 12:08:31

age does matter, as many said on here, it is people in diffferent stages of their lives. I wouldn't consider anyone below 18 at all, so only a year below and I wouldn't consider anyone more then 5 or 6 years above, anymore, and it would be too old and too awkweard. If I was to marry someone 20 years or older, well, hell, they could be my daddy not my lover.

## Post 31 by TechnologyUser2012 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Friday, 24-Aug-2012 20:41:20

yeah exactly lol.

## Post 32 by Master Alex Matthew SARcastic (Account disabled) on Saturday, 25-Aug-2012 7:03:43

Now that I've finally got a girl, she is only 4 years older than me but I don't care, her parents don't care and my Parents don't care. Only thing that matters is our friendship but we've only been together for a few days now, so give me time and I'll post on here if it works out or not.

## Post 33 by TechnologyUser2012 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Saturday, 25-Aug-2012 20:45:05

good luck. hope it works out for you.

## Post 34 by Runner229 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Monday, 17-Sep-2012 2:50:06

Age seems to be more restricted when you are younger, but once you get older, say in your late 40's and above would it matter to you as much? Personally I don't think it would, though I would not date someone who was 70. What I'm saying is I wouldn't stick to someone as close in age as I would be.

## Post 35 by UniqueOne (I'll have the last word, thank you!) on Tuesday, 18-Sep-2012 18:49:02

I personally like dating guys that are older than me. Although, I must agree with the general statement of, "it is a person's maturity levil."
A year ago I dated a guy that was 14 years older than me and I found out in the end of things that he was very immature for his, "age."
I'm 28, dunno if I'd date someone that's 21 or 22..I think it would really depend on the person. There goals, expectations..etc.etc.

## Post 36 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Thursday, 27-Sep-2012 23:34:01

But it is not just about maturity. No it is about physical age. I would never date someone my mothers age would you?

## Post 37 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Friday, 28-Sep-2012 13:33:16

Most likely not, though I think this has more to do with what people of that age are generally going through at that stage of their life more so than the age specifically. I would at least consider a larger age gap if the person was at a similar place in life. Likewise, I'd be a lot less likely to consider dating someone exactly my age if they were still living under their parents' roof, and whose biggest worry was pissing off their family and getting grounded for it.

## Post 38 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Friday, 28-Sep-2012 14:46:38

considering my 9 month stage coach is only 20 years older than I am, yes, if I happened to meet someone around that age who was in a similar place in life as me, and had similar core values as I do, I'd absolutely give them a chance.
in my opinion, saying, "you're 45 years old; I'm 25. although we're at similar places in our lives, and share core values that are both important to us, I refuse to date you cause you're almost 50", is one of the most shallow things ever.

## Post 39 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Friday, 28-Sep-2012 23:40:46

But why do you say that? I mean, it doesn't just make your skin crawl?

## Post 40 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Saturday, 29-Sep-2012 0:17:30

obviously, it doesn't, given what I said in my prior post. I'm not sure why you think it's so disgusting, but to each their own.

## Post 41 by GreenTurtle (Music is life. Love. Vitality.) on Saturday, 29-Sep-2012 1:08:19

The only reason that dating someone who could be my grandfather would make my skin crawl is that they would most likely end up being dead way before me. Personally, losing a lover through death isn't something I want to experience. Of course, that can happen anyway, I'm merely pointing out that it's much more likely with someone who's significantly older. Maybe that's what Margorp was saying.

## Post 42 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Saturday, 29-Sep-2012 10:26:54

shattered sanity, margorp was asking if people would date someone as old as the person that gave birth to them; not the age of their grandfather. that's the question I was answering.
as far as dating someone that's my grandparent's age, though, that, I wouldn't ever do.

## Post 43 by forereel (Just posting.) on Saturday, 29-Sep-2012 18:11:02

Guess I've said. I'll date legal and up. It really depends on the person. 21 or so and up. Skin crawl?
I don't know your age, and I'll not look, but what shape are you in? Maybe you are over weight, and that older person is fit to the 9's who's skin would crawl? She or he'd probably not want to date ar out of shape young person, being she or he has taken so much time to take care of themselves.

## Post 44 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Saturday, 29-Sep-2012 18:40:08

Wayne brought up a great point in his last post that I wish I had thought of, regarding the tables being turned.

## Post 45 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Saturday, 29-Sep-2012 21:20:32

OK. I'm going to play "Devil's Advicate" for just a second here. You would date someone your parents' age, but could never date someone your grandparents' age? So, you do have a line; you just choose to draw it in a different place than Margorp. I can't stand the thought of dating someone my grandparents' age either, but point is, it's hard to call someone close-minded for refusing to date someone their parents' age when you, too, have your limits. there are people who can't stand an age difference of more than a year, and while I could never put myself on such a short leash, their skin crawls when they think of someone with a 10 or 15 year age gap. So, either we all just need to stop thinking about whatever makes us uncomfortable, or just admit that we all, at one point or another, judge others on what may very well be considered close-minded.

## Post 46 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Saturday, 29-Sep-2012 21:34:14

but, the point I was trying to make is that dating someone my grandparent's age doesn't make my skin crawl. I simply wouldn't do it cause we'd both be at different stages in our lives.

## Post 47 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Saturday, 29-Sep-2012 23:22:43

Ah but the fact that you would not do it shows that you do have limits. Just when I was really starting to wonder about myself. The world makes sense again!

## Post 48 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Sunday, 30-Sep-2012 8:52:44

So what if there was someone of that age at a similar place in life? it's extremely unlikely I'll admit, but would that still be out of the question?

## Post 49 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Sunday, 30-Sep-2012 10:17:15

if I met someone who was my grandparent's age that was at a similar place in life as me, although highly unlikely, yes, if we were both interested in one another, I wouldn't deny us a relationship.
for one, I know how it feels to be judged harshly, for any number of reasons. and, I'm also smart enough to know that A, I wouldn't like it if someone decided that, say, my not having a relationship with any blood relatives of mine, is a good enough reason not to give me a chance.
I respect those who have limits, but, for me, personally, I've found otherwise about myself.

## Post 50 by forereel (Just posting.) on Sunday, 30-Sep-2012 16:24:22

I also respect limits, and I suppose I have one. I'll not date under 21. It is simply for legal reasons. I don't think a girl at 18 is a bad choice, but we couldn't go to many places I do, so I suppose that would be under the rule of being at the same place, or liking the same things in live. What makes my skin crawl is nastiness, rudeness, and general unhealthy. I don't mean medically, but people who choose to disrespect there bodies.

## Post 51 by forereel (Just posting.) on Sunday, 30-Sep-2012 16:38:38

Guess I need to add a bit more. I'm not going down to children, but that goes without saying I'd hope. 18 is legal sure, but that really depend.
I have met people that are about 25 30 that are physical recks. The over drink, smoke, do drugs, and are general unhealthy people. I've met a woman in her 70's that would make you drool. Thought she was maybe 40, but nope. There is a popular actress, I think her names Sophia something, she's about 78 and she'd put women in the 30's to shame.
My question is, and I ask it respectfully, is it a persons number of years that causes the issue, or the concept that older people are going to be old as many are?

## Post 52 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Sunday, 30-Sep-2012 16:39:22

I agree with Wayne.

## Post 53 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Sunday, 30-Sep-2012 22:32:12

Oh come off it. Look, to each their own, but I see that as complete crockery. Live and let live however.

## Post 54 by forereel (Just posting.) on Monday, 01-Oct-2012 0:14:53

Crockery?You are telling me that I'm not serious?
If so why is it actual? Are people such as myself not really people?
Have you seen Sharelately? Madonna? Fantastic condition and they date 25 year olds and the boys like it.
Hugh Heffner, well he's aged, but than he's 83 or so, but he dates girls in there 20's 30's 40's.
Okay that is the rich and fit list, but what about the people like me? I'm an actual person and I'll tell you I have and will date up or down the scale and it doesn't matter to me at all. Call me a milf, or cradle snacher if you like, but its truly enjoyable not having to care.

## Post 55 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Monday, 01-Oct-2012 11:12:02

That's on you, then. I won't tire myself telling you how nasty I think it is because I'm not your boss.

## Post 56 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Monday, 01-Oct-2012 12:24:56

I said earlier that I was going to play Devil's Advicate for just a moment. Well, that moment is over. My purpose for doing that was just to point out that you can't really get too upset about someone getting close-minded in terms of age gaps if there's an age gap you couldn't take, either. Now that I'm pretty sure we've cleared that up, I will say that I more or less agree with ForReel here. Margorp, I'm not necessarily going to discredit your opinion, but what is so nasty about this? Everyone is consenting, the relationship seems to be working so far. what's the issue here? What is it about this concept that seems to make your skin crawl so much?

## Post 57 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Monday, 01-Oct-2012 13:55:21

I guess I couldn't really sit here and list the reasons. I've always sort of felt this way; I know I'm not the only one.

## Post 58 by Runner229 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Monday, 01-Oct-2012 16:00:51

Why not? It's hard to believe if you can't give reasons for why it makes you feel such a way?
Personally, whatever makes the two people happy. At my age I wouldn't find it appropriate to date someone very much younger, but I'm more open to dating someone 10 or 12 years older, at most maybe 15.

## Post 59 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Monday, 01-Oct-2012 17:39:03

Ryan is right, margorp, how can you not defend your reasoning behind why you're so sickened by this? surely, if you feel so strongly, you have to have a reason to back up those claims.

## Post 60 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Monday, 01-Oct-2012 23:41:10

Okay okay. I guess I've just always witnessed these norms growing up and I happen to agree with them. It's one of the few things I've grown up with that I agree with. Unfortunately, that's the best reason I can give.

## Post 61 by Runner229 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 3:12:00

These norms you speak of are changing as different generations come about. It's understandable that some things you grow up with you take to heart, but once you are out on your own you have more freedom. Why not experiment and try out something different?

## Post 62 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 7:41:23

Taking issue with large age gaps because you grew up with that as the norm is about as ridiculous as religious folk who believe in god because that's what their parents told them to do.

## Post 63 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 10:28:23

or, saying you belong to a certain political party cause the people you grew up around subscribed to it.
Ryan is right. times are changing, and, dare I say that trying new things, such as going outside of your comfort zone in regards to someone's age, would be worthwhile investments, should an opportunity present itself.

## Post 64 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 11:57:44

I never said you had to agree with a word I said. I also admitted to beeing closed-minded on the subject. I dare you to find someone who can admit to such things. Perhaps the so called norms aren't the only reason. Perhaps I've somehow seen for myself some things that turn me away from it. In any case, you're not going to change my mind.

## Post 65 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 12:39:29

if they aren't the only reason, why can't you explain further?

## Post 66 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 12:46:18

Maybe there are so many I don't know where to start? lol. What's the point of telling you all my reasons? You'd only try to discount all of them and we would just go back and forth. How pointless.

## Post 67 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 12:47:52

Exactly. If you've seen things that turn you away; if there's more to the story than it just being what you're used to, why not explain? And if it's too personal to talk about, then I suggest finding a more appropriate debate; or at the very least, a more affective way of debating this. Imagine if an argument too personal to reveal won you a formal debate? Wow. yes, I know this isn't a formal debate, and yes, I know we're not going to change your opinion. We can, however, point out how ridiculous your posts come off on this topic.

## Post 68 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 12:57:35

margorp, you sure are making a lot of assumptions, and quite frankly, I'm sick and tired of it. assuming we're not genuinely asking for the sake of wanting to know, isn't only ludicrous, but incredibly inaccurate.
this idea that Cody, myself, and others are here to start drama, couldn't be further from the truth. if continuing to buy into that makes you happy, though, more power to you.
and, for the record, no one's goal is to change your mind. I suggest you stop, think about why you're being unnecessarily defensive, and perhaps try to see our questions for the sincerity that they are.

## Post 69 by Runner229 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 13:47:30

We are simply giving you reasons as to why things are the way they are these days. No need to get defensive about it. If you don't want to change your mind so be it. We can't force you to do that.

## Post 70 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 14:27:50

Wow I'm beeing defensive? Sounds as if you are just upset that you can't argue the point further. Perhaps it was my fault for even posting to this topic. And, I don't recall suggesting that you wish to start drama.

## Post 71 by TechnologyUser2012 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 17:03:46

Why does it matter so much to some of you that the previous poster change his mind or think differently about how he feels regarding this particular subject? Is it going to have an affect on your lives in any way? I think not.

## Post 72 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 20:32:59

Hmm. let's count all the recent posts where someone mentioned knowing that we're not going to change his mind. 1, 2, 3, ...4 if you count the post where Margorp himself pointed that out; 5 if you count Technology user's last post. Yeah. I think we get that. I still don't get why some people seem to assume that we're posting with the intent to sway someone's opinion.

## Post 73 by forereel (Just posting.) on Tuesday, 02-Oct-2012 21:48:26

Margort, you are correct that many share you view on this subject, but not having reasons or not knowing them is what is being pointed out to you, so I’ll help you out on this and you tell me if some of them make sense.
Next if they do, have you actually experienced any of them.
On the two young side, there not mature enough. They are too active or don’t understand life.
All they want to do is have fun and there not serious about their future. I can’t be seen with a person like that. It makes me feel like I’m with my son or daughter. They don’t understand my generation.
On the two old part. There sick all the time. I like to go places and all there going to want to do is hang around the house all the time. There not sexually active and won’t be interested in sex as much as I am. All they want to do it tell you how to live. I’m not a child and don’t want to date my mother or father.
The smell old. Yes, I’ve heard that too. The look bad, skin is wrinkled, grey hair, and there unhealthy.
These are some of the gripes. We have no choice how old or young we are, but we do have a choice what we do about it after an age where we start to understand ourselves. I
I really think most of the stigma comes from social acceptance, not need, love, or attraction.
I personally am attracted to women that are interesting to me, age not added. I have already posted my thoughts on that so would go back.
Now tell me if any of these things match your opinion, or can you add others?

## Post 74 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Wednesday, 03-Oct-2012 23:11:09

Because, ocean dream, I believe the intention of this topic was to find out how we feel on the subject. I have stated catigorically that I am against it. Why isn't that enough? If I continue to give my views all that will happen is somebody will most likely say I am full of bullshit and round and round we'll go. So what's the point?

## Post 75 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Wednesday, 03-Oct-2012 23:19:55

ForReel actually laid out quite a few questions: clear and to the point. if you still can't put your finger on why this age difference thing gets under your skin so much, that's on you. But he just made it a lot easier for you.

## Post 76 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Thursday, 04-Oct-2012 14:15:02

Actually, I think forreal actually listed most, if not all of my major reasons for both the to old and the to yung. Well accept for the sick all the time thing. lol! Okay, they have illnesses and that may slow them down...

## Post 77 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Thursday, 04-Oct-2012 14:53:04

Fair enough. See? it wasn't that hard. Lol.

## Post 78 by Runner229 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Thursday, 04-Oct-2012 15:06:48

Where did I say your ideas are bull shit? I'm simply doing what we all do in a debate, sharing my beliefs and saying why I disagree with yours. You seem upset and offended by how I am coming across your ideas. It's all in how you are wording things. That's why I said you are being defensive.

## Post 79 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Thursday, 04-Oct-2012 16:36:16

I echo Ryan's last post completely.

## Post 80 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Thursday, 04-Oct-2012 16:51:18

I didn't say you did say that but on the boards that is usually how it goes. Hell, I've been guilty of doing it.

## Post 81 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Thursday, 04-Oct-2012 17:06:40

well, making assumptions is never good, nor is shying away from saying something cause you think you'll get crap.

## Post 82 by forereel (Just posting.) on Thursday, 04-Oct-2012 18:53:28

I guess this started when you said this my post about different ages and my beliefs on them was a crockory. That is simply not so.
Your views are not crockory, but your views and I like to debate them so that maybe one or the other of us changes our minds, or we learn the reasons behind others opinions, but opinions are never crockory if you can actually say I am just saying my views for shock reasons. I honestly live them.
I've had people tell me I was wrong for dating up or down, but really I've not felt wrong, but honestly enjoyed the experience and I've learned much about my tought concepts, in that if a woman is your age it is good, if a woman is to young for you she's going to be exciting and full of energy, but a baby, and if a woman is to old she's dried up and no use at all! These ideas are simply not so.

## Post 83 by The 5th Teletubby (Generic Zoner) on Thursday, 04-Oct-2012 18:58:34

For me, since I'm 16, I need to think of things like the age of consent. I tried dating a girl recently who had just turned 14 in July, and I turn 17 in December. It freaked me out too much. When I turned 18, she would only be 15, which legally is cutting it pretty close. And though 14 and 17 seem so close together, we were on totally different wavelengths as far as maturity and goals and such. We had nothing in common.
But as you get older, age differences tend to become less and less dramatic. Like, when I'm 27 and she's 24, it won't be strange at all to date. We'll be pretty much at the same speed. But I'd never go as far as dating someone a few decades older than I am. If I can't connect with you, I can't date you properly. And I connect with people my age, or there abouts.

## Post 84 by Runner229 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Thursday, 04-Oct-2012 21:09:25

Exactly what I think.

## Post 85 by GreenTurtle (Music is life. Love. Vitality.) on Thursday, 04-Oct-2012 21:42:58

What matters is the connection you have with a person. If I met someone tomorrow who was 20 or 30 years older than me, and I was attracted to him, honestly I would be more cautious in getting to know the person before we started dating than if, say, they were not so far apart in age, but I'm just being careful in that regard. You can be attracted to someone for any number of reasons before getting to know them, and in my opinion if a big age gap is part of what you're getting to know, you should take it slow. As I said before, dating someone any older than that would just be creepy, simply because of the fact that they would most likely die before me. Logically, I know that I could get struck by lightning tomorrow, but when you think about it, I do have at least a halfway valid point.

## Post 86 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Thursday, 04-Oct-2012 22:18:32

I see what you are saying. I guess going out with someone only to have them keel over would be horrible. Of course, for me at least, it's not a strong enough reason not to go out with an older person.

## Post 87 by forereel (Just posting.) on Saturday, 06-Oct-2012 17:07:30

You'll probably break up before either of you dies, sho who cares? Lol
If I went in to every relationshiip wondering if that person might die before me I'm seeking a life mate every time, not enjoying life. In that case I suppose I'd not date young men that are to healthy, because they might get drafted, than what? Lol
Forget it, I say. Enjoy what you've got to enjoy today. Tomorrows not promised.

## Post 88 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Saturday, 06-Oct-2012 17:11:00

my thoughts exactly, Wayne.

## Post 89 by Thunderstorm (HotIndian!) on Tuesday, 09-Oct-2012 11:23:56

Again I say age is just a number. I count only the maturity.
Dying day is not in our hands of course. a new born baby is also dying and there are many 100 year old people are still living. so don't say if you date someone older, he or she will die soon.
If you truly love someone, age, skin color, etc etc all will go hidden.
Raaj.

## Post 90 by Runner229 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Tuesday, 09-Oct-2012 15:16:25

Exactly, Raaj.

## Post 91 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Tuesday, 09-Oct-2012 22:56:46

In theory, that all you need is love policy is great but it's just not realistic.

## Post 92 by Thunderstorm (HotIndian!) on Wednesday, 10-Oct-2012 5:00:31

all I can say is, you haven't met the right person so far in your life. If you do so, you'll be agreeing my point.
Raaj.

## Post 93 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Wednesday, 10-Oct-2012 11:48:30

hmmm, perhaps.

## Post 94 by BryanP22 (Novice theriminist) on Thursday, 11-Oct-2012 13:02:58

I agree with Margorp. Good in theory but not in practice. Age is no guaranteer of maturity. Neither is youth always a guaranteer of immaturity.

## Post 95 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Thursday, 11-Oct-2012 13:53:20

What I meant really was that it takes more than love.

## Post 96 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Thursday, 11-Oct-2012 14:56:58

that holds true for any age, though, wouldn't you say? I know I would.

## Post 97 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Thursday, 11-Oct-2012 15:17:16

Exactly. It does take more than love to make a relationship, but I'd say age has very little to do with it, unless you make it so.

## Post 98 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Thursday, 11-Oct-2012 17:58:35

It factors in depending on preferance of course.

## Post 99 by forereel (Just posting.) on Thursday, 11-Oct-2012 18:20:08

Well if you are set in your view make sure you connect with someone close to your age. Less food for arguments. Lol
I really think it is a mental thing, not an actual issue. Just like deciding you only will be with a person of your own race, or whatever. Purely mental, and not factual that the relationship will be better.

## Post 100 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Thursday, 11-Oct-2012 22:56:26

I can see how you'd feel that way...

## Post 101 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Friday, 12-Oct-2012 11:20:09

I definitely agree with Wayne. Perceived issues usually become real issues. If you have your mind set that something will not work, it probably will not. If you believe something will work, that doesn't necessarily guarantee that it will. Were that the case, we'd all probably still be with our first partners. But there is at least a chance.

## Post 102 by PokerLady64 (Generic Zoner) on Tuesday, 06-Nov-2012 0:54:08

I would not date a woman that is my dad age.

## Post 103 by Theguitarguy25 (Newborn Zoner) on Wednesday, 26-Dec-2012 18:52:04

See I can see why some of you are for it and some agents it. Personally I feel as if there is a double standard there. Here is why
1 if an older woman dates a younger man the feeling is it is okay to do it. However if an older man is dating a younger woman its lard as creepy.
For those who know the green mile who plays Percy Wettmore recently was dating a 15 year old and recently asked her parreents for her hand in merrage. The weird hint is is her parents said yes.

## Post 104 by forereel (Just posting.) on Wednesday, 26-Dec-2012 20:10:19

Money and fame matters. Smile.

## Post 105 by Runner229 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Wednesday, 26-Dec-2012 22:42:08

Did you mean creepy as lard? Not sure what's creepy about lard.

## Post 106 by GreenTurtle (Music is life. Love. Vitality.) on Wednesday, 26-Dec-2012 23:46:13

Lol, me neither. But I do think that's creepy for a teenager to date and marry someone twice their age. She's probably only in it for the glamor and money, though, which is a shame.

## Post 107 by Theguitarguy25 (Newborn Zoner) on Thursday, 27-Dec-2012 0:17:56

I ment creepy as well an yes mony talks an rap walks

## Post 108 by Runner229 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Thursday, 27-Dec-2012 1:11:11

It could be for a variety of reasons. Maybe he gives her the attention that she wants but never gets, or feels as though she can't get from anyone else. I've heard quite a few stories along those lines. Some 16 or 17-year-old girl dates this 40 something year old guy. She says how loving and affectionate he is, and he makes her feel special. Then suddenly they get closer than she feels comfortable. She tries to pull away, but he rapes her. True story about a girl I knew in high school.

## Post 109 by GreenTurtle (Music is life. Love. Vitality.) on Thursday, 27-Dec-2012 1:30:36

Well then, who do you think is in the wrong there? Naivety is all a part of adolescence to one degree or another, and a guy with more experience and an extra 20 or 30 years under his belt is going to know that. Whose side are you on here?

## Post 110 by Dolce Eleganza (I'll have the last word, thank you!) on Thursday, 21-Mar-2013 4:14:34

I think that a signifacant age different not only is there power, experience and knollidge, but little is acomplished emotionally for the two of them.. (not being sexist) but I prefer dating a guy at least 6 years older because one my age acts like a 16 year old, so no thank you...

## Post 111 by Runner229 (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Thursday, 21-Mar-2013 13:38:42

That is rather stereotypical. Some young guys are very mature for their age. I was forced to grow up fast at a young age because of some events that were out of my control, and a lot of people noticed my maturity versus my age. Many people on here and in person said they thought I was older than I am. That's why I believe age is more so something to look past, with common sense.