# top tongue twister marriages

Category: Joke Board

## Post 1 by Blue Velvet (I've got the platinum golden silver bronze poster award.) on Monday, 12-Feb-2007 23:48:34

Some of the people in this are dead now, so who knows when it was written, but the names are still good for a few chuckles:
If Kitty Carlisle married Conway Twitty, she'd be Kitty Twitty.
If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono.
If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Dolly Dali.
If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she'd be Bo Ho.
If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra, she'd be Oprah Chopra.
If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg (What?), he'd be Cat Doggy Dogg.
If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, she'd be Olivia Newton-John Newton John.
If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she'd become Sondra Locke Ness Munster.
If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting.
If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver.
If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he'd be Snoop Doggy Dogg Pooh.
How about a baseball marriage? If Boog Powell married Felipe Alou, he'd be Boog Alou.
If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then divorced him to marry Kenny G., he'd be G. Ghali G.
Nog (Quark's brother on "Star Trek: Deep Space Nine") has no other name, so he uses it twice when getting a marriage license. If he married Howard Hughes, and then Pamela Dare, he'd be Nog Nog Hughes Dare.
If Shirley Jones married Tom Ewell, then Johnny Rotten, then Nathan Hale, she'd be Shirley Ewell Rotten Hale.
If Ivana Trump married, in succession, Orson Bean (actor), King Oscar (of Norway), Louis B. Mayer (of MGM), and Norbert Wiener (mathematician), she would then be Ivana Bean Oscar Mayer Wiener.
If Woody Allen married Natalie Wood, divorced her and married Gregory Peck, divorced him and married Ben Hur, he'd be Woody Wood Peck Hur.

## Post 2 by blbobby (Ooo you're gona like this!) on Tuesday, 13-Feb-2007 0:21:18

&LT;lol> these are hilareous.
Bob

## Post 3 by BaritoneAu (Regular Zoner) on Tuesday, 13-Feb-2007 2:04:18

If Wanda Hughes (unknown) married Henry Kissinger, she'd be Wanda Hughes-Kissinger...

## Post 4 by Musical Ambition (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Tuesday, 13-Feb-2007 14:12:31

LOL becky. These are hilarious.

## Post 5 by crimson x (This site is so "educational") on Friday, 16-Feb-2007 19:39:19

this is good

## Post 6 by buk buk buk (move over school!) on Saturday, 17-Feb-2007 19:34:19

Lol becky.