# If I see one more such article

Category: Let's talk

## Post 1 by squidwardqtentacles (I just keep on posting!) on Thursday, 09-Sep-2010 19:06:28

it's going to be on the Rant Board. As it was i was deciding if I should rant, or go to the parenting or news & views board, when I saw the info about "Let's Talk".
You know these news articles about child obesity & nutrition that link obesity to poorer neighborhoods? Even in the more conservative newspapers like the Boston Herald some bleeding heart will lament that "the poor are priced out of nutritious, low cal foods like fruits and vegetables for their children." Be near toilet or waste backet, open mouth, insert finger, then see what comes up.
I live in a Massachusetts town that has wealthy families who own oceanfront property, but there are some of us who are part of the masses, a k a working class who rent in the same area. We live near one of the more impoverished towns, East Boston by Logan Airport. And since I moved up here 8 years ago it always AMAZES me what kind of stuff these impoverished parents CAN afford. Gee, maybe if mom wasn't buying that bottle of nail polish with remover, or an $8.00 pack of cigarettes, and maybe if dad, if he even lives in the house, wasn't buying beer, the children could enjoy fruits & vegetables. When I grocery shop, items like canned tuna & beans will have "WIC friendly item" signs by 'em. WIC is generally for low income pregnant women & children under the age of 5, but some men get food assistance for custodial kids. We have umpteen options for public transportation, including a new ferry from Winthrop to downtown Boston, yet it seems people even in these "impoverished" neighborhoods own cars. ?!?! And these are neighborhoods with bus & train access. Gee, maybe if the family wasn't making that monthly payment, along with mandatory car insurance & yearly excise tax, not to mention gas & routine maintenance & repairs, the kids could eat better. I've become convinced that at least for some, poverty is NOT a set of circumstances, but a mindset which includes inability to prioritize. Not all, mind you, some have circumstances beyond their control, or health problems & disabilities that might make things more financially difficult for them, but there are so many others who need to wake up and smell the coffee.
The article from today's BOSTON GLOBE was especially nauseating. A doctor having to do with weight management at Childrens' Hospital in Boston blamed poor neighborhoods, calling them "set up for obesity." Tables have linked wealthier towns like Arlington with more exercise, citing "prohibitive costs" in poorer towns like Lawrence. ?!?! Huh? I have Mimi in Tiny Tumblers at a local gym, which at $14 for one class a week isn't such a bad deal. Swimming lessons run about the same price. And if they really are that cash strapped, how much could it cost to put sneakers on kid(s) and go for family walks? This really is a walkable state. And what about all these sex ed type programs in the schools that were supposed to prevent kids people couldn't afford? I guess it's not politically correct, either, to cite poverty with certain ethnic groups that value more overweight types of women, or more high fat cooking. Nope, can't do that. Or how about suggesting a correlation between income & mind set, like people in wealthier households were more likely to value hard work & physical activity?
And this is from actual experience. I've dealt with people in some of these hard hit households, one woman was so lazy she wouldn't even get up to speak with me as a fellow person, she'd speak to her teenage daughter in Arabic, and this girl would translate into English for me. This woman speaks English, she is just lazy. Another felt a tremendous entitlement to a car, & wouldn't walk or take public transportation to look for a new job, yet always seemed to have money to buy food in gourmet stores & gifts for others' children, yet she herself applied for food stamps. I'm tired of being expected to feel sorry for folks whose troubles are of their own making & whose entitlement mindset is what's holding them back...not the set up of the town, not the lack of activities available, their own mindset. Whew....glad I got that off my chest.

## Post 2 by Blue Velvet (I've got the platinum golden silver bronze poster award.) on Thursday, 09-Sep-2010 21:28:06

I used to share an office (thankfully only for six months before she quit) with a woman who was 29, had been married and divorced four times, and had three kids which were all fathered by different men...none of them her former husbands. This woman made the worst choices of anyone I had ever met. She was constantly whining about being broke, yet she never bought groceries. She took the kids to McDonalds and other fast food restaurants every night. She had to buy Mary Kay cosmetics and wouldn't settle for drugstore brands. She even had to have fake nails professionally put on and took her 5-year-old daughter to also get manicures. Yet she couldn't afford healthy groceries? I got so fed up with her whining I quit answering her whenever she would ask for my advice because she didn't listen to anything I said.

## Post 3 by CrazyMusician (If I don't post to your topic, it's cuz I don't give a rip about it!) on Thursday, 09-Sep-2010 22:11:58

We had a receptionist for three months who was like that. She had five kids by three fathers, maybe one of which she married, and she was living with a boyfriend who wouldn't get a good job, so her mom was bringing her groceries and stuff while she's going out for lunch every day. She quit the job, which is a hilarious story in itself.

## Post 4 by LeoGuardian (You mean there is something outside of this room with my computer in it?) on Thursday, 09-Sep-2010 22:36:15

Good thing I'm in software and not social service. That would drive me insane! There were people in the vending program out here who could royally fuck up a place, leave it for us working stiffs to pick up after 'em, and still somehow have the cash to buy new stuff.
Figure that

## Post 5 by turricane (happiness and change are choices ) on Friday, 10-Sep-2010 9:56:17

well, we can blame the poor people for making stupid choices, but it is more complicated than that. Juice is more expensive than fruit, but the add agencies convince us that we must have it. a lot of problems go with poor priority and time management. i have a friend whose daughter is in three count 'em three soccer leagues. plus she is a girl scout. they eat out three or more nights a week. surprise surprise, despite all the exercise, she is obese. I suggested that they substitute a side salad for the fries and water for the soda. you'd have thought I was suggesting she have arsenic laced chocolates or something. I think a lot of the food issues go back to that four p situation. You know piss poor parenting problems.

## Post 6 by turricane (happiness and change are choices ) on Friday, 10-Sep-2010 9:58:15

oh for the record, my son is unemployed right now as is his wife. guess what? they eat at home, buy what wic recommends, and stretch the dollar until it screams. their little girl is appropriate in size and rarely sick. what a shocker.
i'm not bragging, but the reason they are that way is because both her mom and I raised them with similar values. eating out was a treat not a right. you buy what you can afford. you know stuff like that.

## Post 7 by Miss M (move over school!) on Friday, 10-Sep-2010 11:32:58

It's not so cut and dried.
When the media throws around the idea of "low income neighborhoods," they're not thinking about the deeper layers that go with that statement.
First, education. The families that live in low income neighborhoods have most likely not been introduced to the idea of "good nutrition." As a child you ate what your parents gave you, and as you got older that was what you liked, so you fed it to your kids, and so on. The majority of people in every walk of life don't think to look at ingredient lists or nutrition labels until someone or something really drives home how important they are. Most public schools glaze over the idea of important nutritional choices in classes, so kids aren't learning anything different even now.
Second, programs like WIC and foodstamps and whatever else. My friend, who was pregnant, was brought onto one of these types of programs. Due to large milk subsidy programs in the US, you can buy gallons upon gallons of milk every month, but your variety and and maximum allowance of other liquids like fruit juices or protein drinks are much more limited. These programs give parents the opportunity to buy a lot of healthy food, but again, without the educational component, it doesn't always happen.
Third, location. Many low-income neighborhoods aren't near large grocery stores, which often are on the outskirts of towns or cities, and instead are located next to fast food and convenience stores that sell staple foods like milk, cereal, deli meats and bread, but not veggies or fruits or other ingredients vital to home-making good meals. If you don't have a car to store them in, using the bus system to go all the way out to a grocery store and then trying to get all of your grocery bags home can be a bit of a bastard.
It's not any one group's fault for childhood obesity. Humans as a species have poor impulse control, love instant gratification, and are naturally self-destructive. The fatness will continue so long as we allow it to.

## Post 8 by CrazyMusician (If I don't post to your topic, it's cuz I don't give a rip about it!) on Friday, 10-Sep-2010 12:27:11

I think both Turricane and MissM are right on this. It's not solely the educattion system's job to teach good nutrition, but the parents are to do that as well.
To be honest, if more schools/organizations/families teach about budgeting, I doubt the worl would be in the mess it's in today. Don't spend more than you make, don't mooch off the generosity of others but don't be afraid to occasionally ask for assistance, and actually write down what you spend money on (surprise, surprise!) This all seems like common sense, but very few people are brought up that way. Not to mention advertising. "Buy this sandwich for $3.99!" You know you can make the same sandwich for half the price? And that's just one example! People are just lazy and care about self-gratification, so no wonder kids are obese. Generally, parents pass on lazy habits to lazy kids who grow up to have kids and teach their kids that laziness is ok, and on and on it goes.
ow, there are occasional medical reasons for someone to be obese (my husband has one of them), and I am not talking about those, so just don't go there.
Crazy Kate

## Post 9 by squidwardqtentacles (I just keep on posting!) on Friday, 10-Sep-2010 19:32:48

Some good ideas here...I like the one about teaching budgeting. I know to get married in some states people have to take a class, believe it or not, in how divorce might affect any children (Florida). At one time here people getting married had to do a syphillis blood test. To get divorced each party has to take a class in how to be civil while parenting any children (not sure if that's the case for childless folks getting divorced). Maybe a requirement for any food or medical assistance should be a budgeting class.
Arizona had some proposed welfare legislation, but I don't know how that's going. The proposal was denial of benefits for those who used cash to buy alcohol & cigarettes after using food stamps or vouchers for those purchases. Basic cable? OK according to the proposal, HBO not. A car up to a certain financial worth? OK, but if it's worth more than that amount, not OK. Cell phone as your only means of communication? OK, but not OK if you have one in addition to a land line. I'll have to look at how that's going. Personally I support yearly passport checks for anyone receiving assistance, but that's another story. I'm just tired of paying for basics & seeing kids get into unhealthy habits when the parent(s) seem to have so much set aside for luxuries.