# How well do you take rejection?

Category: Dating and Relationships

## Post 1 by TheLeslieThing (I can't call it a day til I enter the zone BBS) on Thursday, 04-Feb-2010 15:16:26

Some people take it well, some don't. How well do you take rejection? For me, I've only ever been rejected once. I was sad and I cried a little tiny bit, but I got over it quickly.
Leslie

## Post 2 by kinky blinky :) (telling it like it is) on Thursday, 04-Feb-2010 18:44:53

hmm. get down a bit, then life goes on! plenty more peole to get to know and like, and, maybe love you just never know

## Post 3 by Shadow_Cat (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Thursday, 04-Feb-2010 19:34:37

I think it depends on how the person rejecting you does it. Are they kind about it, or a jerk? And, also depends on why they're rejecting you. Is it over some small detail that's stupid, or some big, legitimate issue? Of course, what classifies as kind vs. jerk, or little vs. big reason depends on the person, too. LOL. I try to take it well, but sometimes don't. I cry, then deal with it, and eventually move on, but dealing with it usually takes time.

## Post 4 by butterfly star (Generic Zoner) on Thursday, 04-Feb-2010 22:32:54

I dont take rejection very well at all I've been rejcted alot it seems like but days go by and I get over it.there is alot of other people that you can meet.

## Post 5 by LeoGuardian (You mean there is something outside of this room with my computer in it?) on Friday, 05-Feb-2010 11:17:27

Interesting question.
Perhaps the younger generation of girls will have an easier time of it since in the 1980s and thereabouts, girls were closer to a time when they were being asked, not doing the asking.
But this makes me think of a quote from a book I read to my daughter when she was pretty little, the American Girls series on Addie, the little slave girl. Well, once she was made free - her mom and she having run off - she was told: "Freedom's got a cost." Made for an interesting moment for my daughter and I but here's the thing:
Men for years have been taught to handle it and now that the ERA and other events are twenty years old, perhaps its time women find out - and ar given the same tools - how to deal with it. Hard to swallow, yes. But the rejection is far more about the rejector than the rejected. So if you're rejected because of something shallow, or an overidealistic expectation on the part of the other person, that's like getting hit in the head with a flying baseball or rock ... and you wouldn't go blaming yourself for being hit by one of those, so one can't really blame oneself for being hurt by rejection.

## Post 6 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Friday, 05-Feb-2010 13:32:14

I think it also depends how much you want to be with the person. Are you wanting a serious relationship with them? Or are you just casually interested?
That brings up another question: What, in your opinion, is the best way to do the rejecting? If you're just honestly not interested in the person for various reasons, but you don't want to hurt them either. I wouldn't enter into a relationship I wasn't interested in, but I'm also not interested in hurting people either. Also, some people just don't want to take "no" for an answer. I don't necessarily mean stocking, but those people that are just so interested that they don't want to let go.
I don't mind so much telling people that I'm happily taken, but when you're single, you can't take the easy way out. By that, I mean that you can't say you're taken and give no other reason.

## Post 7 by maroon five (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Saturday, 06-Feb-2010 19:10:25

i think it depends on what the situation is. if your being rejected over something stupid, then you should feel hurt and then just move on, but if it's something major, then you have every right to do whatever it takes to get yourself through, and past the hurt. a good cry never hurt anyone, because no matter what the situation, their was feelings involved, and denighing yourself the chance to let them out, doesn't help you in the end.

## Post 8 by maroon five (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Saturday, 06-Feb-2010 19:16:34

i used to not take rejection well at all, but i learnt some good coping skills, and now, if i get rejected, i just go and deal with it the best way i kno how. not necessarily have a good cry, but if i need to just go and write things down, or if i need to go talk to a friend, then that's what i do. i don't go out and punch walls or smash things, because that won't help me at all, but i do constructive things, things that let me express how much i'm hurting, and then i can pull myself together and get past it all.

## Post 9 by Blue Velvet (I've got the platinum golden silver bronze poster award.) on Saturday, 06-Feb-2010 19:23:07

I don't take it well at all. All the men who have rejected me are now buried in my basement...nope, not well at all. Muwhahahahaha!

## Post 10 by Little Smoky (Veteran Zoner) on Sunday, 07-Feb-2010 0:31:22

Yep! And I am one of them. By the way, it's a bit cold down here!

## Post 11 by Shadow_Cat (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Sunday, 07-Feb-2010 9:09:42

Lmao to Becky and Smoky. You guys crack me up.

## Post 12 by maroon five (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Sunday, 07-Feb-2010 16:00:13

lmaoooo to post 9. you probablly should have just had them eaten by a warewolf or something to begin with. then they couldn't scream to be let out when you put them down their, and the smell....but hey, torcher is good to. lol!

## Post 13 by Miss Gorgeous (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 08-Feb-2010 23:11:31

I agree with poster 2. I rejected lots of guys, but I've been rejected a couple of times. Its a part of life. Everyone goes through rejections. Its no big deal unless you let it get to you.

## Post 14 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Friday, 12-Feb-2010 14:34:15

Sure it hurts but it's all a part of the human ixperiance.

## Post 15 by Pure love (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Friday, 12-Feb-2010 15:01:35

I don't take rejection well at all. Especially from people I like and I know. But even if they are almost strangers it hurts. How much more when you know and like the person. I cry for das when I am rejected. I'm just too emotional I guess.

## Post 16 by wildebrew (We promised the world we'd tame it, what were we hoping for?) on Friday, 12-Feb-2010 17:29:45

Wayne Gredski got traded, Brad Pitt got dumped, name your supermodel, actor rockor sports star, they've been rejected at one point or another. Kind of helps putting one's own rejection into perspective, sorta, that and a lot of wine, and a sweater, if you end up in Becky's basement.
One thing I don't like people doing is to blame everything that went wrong on the other person and then paint him/her as a jerk and moron, or a bitch, and tell the world about it. Everyone has coped like this at times I think, I have too a little, but it really kind of blemishes the moments you did have together, and I think the good times are important to remember even if the person you had them with turned out not to stick, or you got tired of them.
Keep the good times, do a little bit of bashing, drink a little, hve some crazy fun and move on, easier said than done, but, possible, and if you get with Becky of course .. make sure not to reject her, or at east do not do it in the winter time, it gets awfully cold in Ohio basements.

## Post 17 by Blue Velvet (I've got the platinum golden silver bronze poster award.) on Saturday, 13-Feb-2010 13:22:51

But WB, dead people can't feel the cold. LOL
I agree with what you said about keeping bashing the person who dumped you to a minimum. No one is perfect, and no one is always right or always wrong. It's not fair to always blame the other person.

## Post 18 by hi5 (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Sunday, 14-Feb-2010 14:00:45

That's right no matter how badly it hurts, its good to keep in mind that nobody's perfect. I'm on the agressive side; I'm usually the one doing the asking out so over time I've gotten better with rejection. Breaking up now, is a totally different thing. I finally put an end to a dead end relationship that lasted for years. It was one of the most difficult things I've ever done *bites into apple*.

## Post 19 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Sunday, 14-Feb-2010 23:26:02

One thing to keep in mind is that if you get rejected, you will one day inevidably end up rejecting someone. It's a vicious circle.

## Post 20 by hi5 (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Tuesday, 16-Feb-2010 0:26:07

Yep and there are some people who really don't handle it well. When I was in high school I turned down this guy once and he tried to ruine my next relationship because I picked that guy over him. The relationship didn't work out unfortunately, and do you know he had the nurve to walk around with me on the indoor track pretending to console me when he was actually relishing his revenge? Omg!

## Post 21 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Tuesday, 16-Feb-2010 11:44:21

Sorry, but us guys tend to act that way. Isn't it a shame?

## Post 22 by The Elemental Dragon (queen of dragons) on Tuesday, 09-Mar-2010 21:25:31

don't take it well at all. emotional, so i cry alot... and alot.. only been rejected once, but lost plenty of friendships, so...

## Post 23 by bozmagic (The rottie's your best friend if you want him/her to be, lol.) on Wednesday, 10-Mar-2010 21:04:31

Hmmm! I'd say I took rejection the worst out of all you guys, lol. One minute, I'm wanting to smash my Ex's face in, make him fall, crumble, cry to pay him back, make him experience both the physical and emmotional pain I've felt for the last nearly 10 months, the next minute, I'm in tears, I'm melting all over thinking, no I can't do that, I have to still be his friend, as close to him as I can and just be there for him. I know he has more bad times ahead, since he's now with this other girl, a lot more disabled than me with this muscular Atrophy disorder since she's in a wheelchair and stuff, but despite all this, she's just messed my poor Ex around with this other bloke for 6 months before finally, picking my Ex. She's basically been fucking around, 2-timing them both, he knows he's just fallen for her and if you ask me, once a two-timer, always a two-timer, 3-timer, 4-timer, 5-timer, Etc Etc. Look at my own bloody father! Hmm, I've probably divulged too much on this board, but, that's another reason why I can't take this rejection thing well, because I know the person who rejected me as an absolutely corking, fantastic guy and well, my best friend with the acception of my best friend from School, for, coming up to 18 months now, and I didn't ever, ever, want him hurt, especially if he felt I couldn't be the one and because I couldn't be the one, he was fucked around by the wrong sort, like what's happened now! Oo! It stinks!
Jen.

## Post 24 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Thursday, 11-Mar-2010 14:14:30

Yeah. that kind of thing always adds a bit of salt to the wound, doesn't it?

## Post 25 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Monday, 15-Mar-2010 12:17:53

Uh...wow.

## Post 26 by play_girl (Generic Zoner) on Monday, 15-Mar-2010 21:31:51

I see rejection as just another part of the story of life, I have been rejected, and it stung a little, I just took a moment to gather myself, and went on to the next part of my life. You just got to pick yourself up after it happens, and don't let it get you down. I also feel that you can learn something from every painful moment in life.

## Post 27 by OceanDream (An Ocean of Thoughts) on Tuesday, 16-Mar-2010 7:00:51

I totally agree. The painful moments will make you stronger if you choose to let them.

## Post 28 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Tuesday, 16-Mar-2010 15:07:22

So true.

## Post 29 by CountrySinger (Account disabled) on Tuesday, 30-Mar-2010 0:09:15

I usually take rejection pretty well. Since I'm not in a relationship right now, I'm just having fun. If someone doesn't want to have fun with me, it's her loss.

## Post 30 by starfly (99956) on Wednesday, 08-Sep-2010 11:56:38

you know! pimpen ant easy!!, got to let some go and keep some. :) :) Na I used to bee bad about taking rejection bad but now I am just okay, what next.

## Post 31 by squidwardqtentacles (I just keep on posting!) on Thursday, 09-Sep-2010 14:34:32

I'm afraid not well at all that's why I'm not in sales. However if my current spouse & I went our separate ways, male rejection in some cases would be doing us both a favor. Why should a man who doesn't want to date a mom accept me? That's not fair to me, as he may really not enjoy my daughter, and that's not fair to him, being with me when what he wants is a childless woman. I understand rejection now that I'm older & more experienced. It hurts at first, and it sounds like a cliche, but in the end they're doing you a favor.

## Post 32 by Westcoastcdngrl (move over school!) on Wednesday, 22-Sep-2010 17:54:09

The last person to reject me once told me to "kill with kindness" this person at work who was annoying me. In turn, I have chosen to turn the other cheek and kill him with kindness... while I've deleted (but not blocked) them from my Skype contact list and deleted their texts and emails (of which there were many), I have no intention of treating this person any worse than before they met and subsequently rejected me.
I sent an "olive branch" message out to them, trying to figure out why they have chosen to act the way that they have - the proverbial ball is in their court - and while I have not had a response of any kind from them, their silence speaks volumes to me as to how much they valued what we had.
Sucks to be me in this situation, but oh well... whatever.

## Post 33 by Thunderstorm (HotIndian!) on Thursday, 23-Sep-2010 10:40:48

I take rejection as someone blowing a bugle in my ear to wake me up and get going, rather than retreat.
Sylvester Stallone.
I'm a very sensitive man. I cried over after my first rejection. and now I've been taught a good lesson with my earlier experiences. I guess.
Raaj

## Post 34 by Geemoney (Generic Zoner) on Tuesday, 07-Dec-2010 15:12:31

Naw rejection is just another push to come a llot harder next time. I like a challenge. Anything to easy is boring.