# Lawyer humor

Category: Joke Board

## Post 1 by Star (Honorary Bitch of the Zone) on Sunday, 15-May-2005 23:38:11

A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural South Dakota. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing.
The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."
The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming
over here."
The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the United States and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own.
The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes in South Dakota. We settle small disagreements like this with the Coyote "Three Kick Rule."
The lawyer asked, "What is the Coyote Three Kick Rule?"
The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up."
The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.
The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.
The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old coot. Now it's my turn."
[I love this part...]
The old farmer smiled and said, "Naw, I give up. You can have the duck.

## Post 2 by laced-unlaced (Account disabled) on Monday, 16-May-2005 5:15:53

un....very ur...confusing. what's the joke exactly?

## Post 3 by Resonant (Find me alive.) on Monday, 16-May-2005 8:18:29

Hehe... ahem... how very infantile and... hehe *snort* I appear to have the sense of humour of a 10-year-old, but that cracked me up! Mwah!

## Post 4 by laced-unlaced (Account disabled) on Monday, 16-May-2005 8:28:48

hahah what's the joke

## Post 5 by Resonant (Find me alive.) on Wednesday, 18-May-2005 7:22:50

Basically, that the redneck farmer tricked the yuppy lawyer into letting him kick the crap out of him, and it was all in the terms of their agreement.

## Post 6 by laced-unlaced (Account disabled) on Wednesday, 18-May-2005 16:54:48

cool. get it now.

## Post 7 by kgs4674forever (Zone BBS is my Life) on Monday, 30-May-2005 12:50:33

ah yes, nothing like landing in a pile of cow shit. Good one.