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  ,,:AT IS ! MATT]80 CRI$ ! COOK1 5T]+ !
ROOM2 8:5 W MA/] H 8 D9N]80
  8,N"E40  8,&1 8 SUPP]80                     #AH
  8,I DON'T "K4 ,HE SAYS HE W EAT NO M1
NEI % ,I4 ,MY UNCLE HAS DET]M9$ 6FA/ &
MAKE ME FA/ UNTIL HE MAKES \ ? ABOM9A#
9SCRIP;N10 ,I REPLI$4
  8,Y W 2 />V$ 6D1?10 %E SD4
  ,I 0 V M* (! SAME OP9ION1 B N LIK+
6SAY S1 S5T H] AWAY1 & 2GAN "S ( MY
USUAL "W ( CLASSIFIC,N4 ,B TRY Z ,I
MI<T1 NO?+ CD KEEP ME F ?9K+ ALT]NATELY
(! /UPID MANUSCRIPT &(! PRETTY ,GRET*54
  ,S"EAL "TS ,I ?"\ ( GO+ \1 B MY UNCLE
WD H BE5 ANGRY AT MY ABS;E4 ,AT ! 5D (
AN H\R1 MY ALLOTT$ TASK 0 D"O4 ,H[ 6PASS
! "T8 ,I 2GAN 0LI<T+ MY PIPE4 ,L ALL O!R
/UD5TS1 ,I DELI<T$ 9 TOBA3O2 &1 S1T+ MYF
9 ! GRT >M*AIR1 ,I 2GAN 6?9K4
  ,": 0 MY UNCLE8 ,I CD EASILY IMAG9E HM
TE>+ AL;G "S SOLIT>Y ROAD1 GE/ICULAT+1
TALK+ 6HMF1 CUTT+ ! AIR ) 8 CANE1 & /
?9K+ (! ABSURD BIT ( HI]OGLYPHICS4 ,WD
HE HIT ^U "S CLUE8 ,WD HE -E HOME 9
BETT] HUMOR8 ,:ILE ^! ?"\S 7 PASS+ "? MY
BRA91 ,I ME*ANIC,Y TOOK UP ! EXECRA#
PUZZLE & TRI$ E IMAG9A# WAY ( GR\P+ !LRS4 ,I PUT !M TGR 0TWOS1 0?REES1    #AI
F\RS1 & FIVES- 9 VA94 ,NO?+ 9TELLIGI#
CAME \1 EXCEPT T ! F\RTE5?1 FIFTE5?1 &
SIXTE5? MADE ICE 9 ,5GLI%2 ! EI<TY-F\R?1
EI<TY-FIF?1 & EI<TY-SIX?1 ! ^W SIR2 !N
AT LA/ ,I SEEM$ 6F9D ! ,LAT9 ^WS ROTA1
MUTABILE1 IRA1 ;NEC1 ATRA4
  8,HA6 "! SEEMS 6BE "S TRU? 9 MY
UNCLE'S NO;N1 ?"\ ,I4
  ,!N AG ,I SEEM$ 6F9D ! ^W LUCO1 : M1NS
SACR$ WOOD4 ,!N 9 ! ?IRD L9E ,I APPE>$
6MAKE \ LABIL$1 A P]FECT ,HEBREW ^W1 &
AT ! LA/ ! SYLLA#S M]E1 >E1 M]1 : 7
,FR5*4
  ,X 0 5 6DRIVE "O MAD4 ,F\R DI6]5T
IDIOMS 9 ? ABSURD PHRASE4 ,:AT 3NEC;N CD
"! 2 2T ICE1 SIR1 ANG]1 CRUEL1 SACR$
WOOD1 *ANG+1 "M1 >E1 & SEA8 ,! F/ &! LA/
MI<T1 9 A S5T;E 3NECT$ ) ,ICEL&1 M1N SEA
( ICE4 ,B :AT (! RE/ ( ? MON/R\S
CRYPTOGRAPH8
  ,I WAS1 9 FACT1 FI<T+ AG/ AN 9SURM.TA#
DI6ICULTY2 MY BRA9 0 ALM ON FIRE2 MY
EYES 7 /RA9$ ) />+ AT ! P>*;T2 ! :OLE
ABSURD COLLEC;N ( LRS APPE>$ 6D.E 2F MYVI.N 9 A NUMB] ( BLACK LL GR\PS4     #BJ
,MY M9D 0 POSSESS$ ) TEMPOR>Y HALLUC9,N-
,I 0 /IFL+4 ,I WANT$ AIR4 ,ME*ANIC,Y ,I
FANN$ MYF )! DOCU;T1 ( : N[ ,I SAW !
BACK & !N ! FRONT4
  ,IMAG9E MY SURPRISE :5 GLANC+ AT !
BACK (! WE>I"S PUZZLE1 ! 9K HAV+ G"O "?1
,I CLE>LY MADE \ ,LAT9 ^WS1 & AM;G O!RS
CRAT]EM & T]RE/RE4
  ,I _H 4COV]$ ! SECRET6
  ,X CAME ^U ME L A FLA% ( LI<TN+4 ,I _H
GOT ! CLUE4 ,ALL Y _H 6D 6"U/& ! DOCU;T
0 6R1D X BACKW>DS4 ,ALL ! 9G5I\S ID1S (!
,PROFESSOR 7 R1LIZ$2 HE _H DICTAT$ X
"RLY 6ME2 0A M]E A3ID5T ,I _H 4COV]$ :AT
HE S M* DESIR$4
  ,MY DELI<T1 MY EMO;N MAY 2 IMAG9$1 MY
EYES 7 DAZZL$ & ,I TREM#D S T AT F/ ,I
CD MAKE NO?+ ( X4 ,"O LOOK1 H["E1 WD
TELL ME ALL ,I WI%$ 6"K4
  8,LET ME R1D10 ,I SD 6MYF1 AF DRAW+ A
L;G BR1?4
  ,I SPR1D X 2F ME ON ! TA#1 ,I PASS$ MY
F+] OV] EA* LR1 ,I SPELL$ X "?2 9 MY
EXCITE;T ,I R1D X \4  ,:AT HORROR & /UPEFAC;N TOOK       #BA
POSSES.N ( MY S\L4 ,I 0 L A MAN :O _H
RCVD A KNOCK-D[N BL[4 ,0 X POSSI# T ,I
RE,Y R1D ! T]RI# SECRET1 & X _H RE,Y BE5
A3OMPLI%$6 ,A MAN _H D>$ 6D- :AT8
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  8,N"E60 CRI$ ,I1 JUMP+ UP4 8,N"E % MY
UNCLE 2 MADE AW>E (! DR1D SECRET4 ,HE WD
2 Q CAPA# ( "UTAK+ ! T]RI# J\RNEY4 ,NO?+
WD *ECK HM1 NO?+ /OP HM4 ,WORSE1 HE WD
-PEL ME 6A3OMPANY HM1 & WE %D 2 LO/ ="E4
,B NO2 S* FOLLY & MAD;S _C 2 ALL[$40
  ,I 0 ALM 2S MYF ) RAGE & FURY4
  8,MY WOR?Y UNCLE IS ALR NE>LY MAD10 ,I
CRI$ AL\D4 8,? WD F9I% HM4 ,0"S A3ID5T
HE MAY MAKE ! 4COV]Y2 9 : CASE1 WE >E
BO? LO/4 ,P]I% ! FE>;L SECRET- LET !
FLAMES ="E BURY X 9 OBLIVION40
  ,I SNAT*$ UP BOOK & P>*;T1 & 0 AB 6CA/
!M 96! FIRE1 :5 ! DOOR OP5$ & MY UNCLE
5T]$4
  ,I _H SC>CELY "T 6PUT D[N ! WRET*$
DOCU;TS 2F MY UNCLE 0 0MY SIDE4 ,HE 0
PROF.DLY ABSORB$4 ,8 ?"\S 7 EVID5TLY B5T
ON ! T]RI# P>*;T4 ,"S NEW -B9,N _HPROBABLY /RUCK HM :ILE TAK+ 8        #BB
WALK4
  ,HE S1T$ HMF 9 8 >M*AIR1 &)A P5 2GAN
6MAKE AN ALGEBRAICAL CALCUL,N4 ,I WAT*$
HM ) ANXI\S EYES4 ,MY FLE% CRAWL$ Z X
2CAME PROBA# T HE WD 4COV] ! SECRET4
  ,8 -B9,NS ,I KNEW N[ 7 USE.S1 ,I HAV+
4COV]$ ! "O ONLY CLUE4 ,= ?REE MORTAL
H\RS HE 3T9U$ )\T SP1K+ A ^W1 )\T RAIS+
8 H1D1 SCRAT*+1 REWRIT+1 CALCULAT+ OV] &
OV] AG4 ,I KNEW T 9 "T HE M/ HIT ^U ! "R
PHRASE4 ,! LRS ( E ALPHABET H ONLY A
C]TA9 NUMB] ( -B9,NS4 ,B !N YE>S MI<T
ELAPSE 2F HE WD >RIVE AT ! CORRECT
SOLU;N4
  ,/ "T W5T ON2 NI<T CAME1 ! S.DS 9 !
/REETS C1S$- & / MY UNCLE W5T ON1 N EV5
ANSW]+ \R WOR?Y COOK :5 %E CALL$ U
6SUPP]4
  ,I DID N D>E 6L1VE HM1 S WAV$ H] AWAY1
& AT LA/ FELL ASLEEP ON ! S(A4
  ,:5 ,I AWOKE MY UNCLE 0 / AT "W4 ,8 R$
EYES1 8 PALLID C.T5.E1 8 MATT$ HAIR1 8
FEV]I% H&S1 8 HECTIC,Y FLU%$ *EEKS1 %[$
H[ T]RI# _H BE5 8 /RU7LE )! IMPOSSI#1 &:AT FE>;L FATIGUE HE _H "UG"O DUR+   #BC
T L;G SLEEP.S NI<T4 ,X MADE ME Q ILL
6LOOK AT HM4 ,?\< HE 0 R SEV]E ) ME1 ,I
LOV$ HM1 & MY HE>T A*$ AT 8 SU6]+S4 ,HE
0 S OV]COME 0"O IDEA T HE CD N EV5 GET 9
A PAS.N6 ,ALL 8 5]GIES 7 FOCUS$ ON "O
PO9T4 ,& ,I KNEW T 0SP1K+ "O LL ^W ALL ?
SU6]+ WD C1SE4 ,I CD N SP1K X4
  ,MY HE>T WAS1 N"E!.S1 9CL9+ T[>DS HM4
,:Y1 !N1 DID ,I REMA9 SIL5T8 ,9 ! 9T]E/
( MY UNCLE HMF4
  8,NO?+ % MAKE ME SP1K10 ,I MUTT]$4
8,HE W WANT 6FOLL[ 9 ! FOOT/EPS (! O!R6
,I "K HM WELL4 ,8 IMAG9,N IS A P]FECT
VOLCANO1 & 6MAKE 4COV]IES 9 ! 9T]E/S (
GEOLOGY HE WD SACRIFICE 8 LIFE4 ,I W
"!=E 2 SIL5T & /RICTLY KEEP ! SECRET ,I
H 4COV]$4 ,6REV1L X WD 2 SUICIDAL4 ,HE
WD N ONLY RU%1 HMF1 6DE/RUC;N1 B DRAG ME
) HM40
  ,I CROSS$ MY >MS1 LOOK$ ANO!R WAY &
SMOK$- RESOLV$ N"E 6SP1K4
  ,:5 \R COOK WANT$ 6G \ 6M>KET1 OR ON
ANY O!R ]R&1 %E F.D ! FRONT DOOR LOCK$ &
! KEY TAK5 AWAY4 ,0 ? D"O PURPOSELY ORN8 ,SURELY ,PROFESSOR ,H>DWIGG DID   #BD
N 9T5D ! OLD WOMAN & MYF 62COME M>TYRS
6HIS OB/9ATE W4 ,7 WE 6BE />V$ 6D1?8 ,A
F"R;L RECOLLEC;N CAME 6MY M9D4 ,ONCE WE
_H F$ ON BITS & SCRAPS =A WEEK :ILE HE
SORT$ "S CURIOSITIES4 ,X GAVE ME ! CRAMP
EV5 6?9K ( X6
  ,I WANT$ MY BR1KFA/1 & ,I SAW NO WAY (
GETT+ X4 ,/ MY RESOLU;N HELD GD4 ,I WD
/>VE R ?AN YIELD4 ,B ! COOK 2GAN 6TAKE
ME S]I\SLY 6TASK4 ,:AT 0 6BE D"O8 ,%E CD
N G \2 & ,I D>$ N4
  ,MY UNCLE 3T9U$ C.T+ & WRIT+2 8
IMAG9,N SEEM$ 6H TRANSLAT$ HM 6! SKIES4
,HE NEI ?"\ ( EAT+ NOR DR9K+4 ,9 ? WAY
TWELVE O'C CAME R.D4 ,I 0 HUNGRY1 & "! 0
NO?+ 9 ! H\SE4 ,! COOK _H EAT5 ! LA/ BIT
( BR1D4 ,? CD N G ON4 ,X DID1 H["E1
UNTIL TWO1 :5 MY S5S,NS 7 T]RI#4 ,AF
ALL1 ,I 2GAN 6?9K ! DOCU;T V ABSURD4
,P]H X MI<T ONLY 2 A GIGANTIC HOAX4
,2SS1 "S M1NS WD SURELY 2 F.D 6KEEP MY
UNCLE BACK F ATTEMPT+ ANY S* ABSURD
EXP$I;N4 ,ON ! O!R H&1 IF HE DID ATTEMPT
ANY?+ S QUIXOTIC1 ,I %D N 2 -PELL$6A3OMPANY HM4 ,ANO!R L9E ( R1SON+    #BE
"PI,Y DECID$ ME4 ,V LIKELY HE WD MAKE !
4COV]Y HMF :5 ,I %D H SU6]$ />V,N =
NO?+4 ,"U ! 9FLU;E ( HUNG] ? R1SON+
APPE>$ ADMIRA#4 ,I DET]M9$ 6TELL ALL4
  ,! "Q N[ >OSE Z 6H[ X 0 6BE D"O4 ,I 0
/ DWELL+ ON ! ?"\1 :5 HE ROSE & PUT ON 8
HAT4
  ,:AT6 G \ & LOCK U IN8 ,N"E6
  8,UNCLE10 ,I 2GAN4
  ,HE DID N APPE> EV5 6HE> ME4
  8,PROFESSOR ,H>DWIGG10 ,I CRI$4
  8,:AT10 HE RETORT$1 8DID Y SP1K80
  8,H[ AB ! KEY80
  8,:AT KEY- ! KEY (! DOOR8
  8,NO- ( ^! HORRI# HI]OGLYPHICS8
  ,HE LOOK$ AT ME F "U 8 SPECTACLES1 &
/>T$ AT ! ODD EXPRES.N ( MY FACE4 ,RU%+
=W>D1 HE CLUT*$ ME 0! >M & KE5LY EXAM9$
MY C.T5.E4 ,8 V LOOK 0 AN 9T]ROG,N4
  ,I SIMPLY NO4$4
  ,) AN 9CR$UL\S %RUG (! %\LD]S1 HE
TURN$ ^U 8 HEEL4 ,UND\BT$LY HE ?"\ ,I _H
G"O MAD4
  8,I H MADE A V IMPORTANT 4COV]Y40  ,8 EYES FLA%$ ) EXCITE;T4 ,8 H&    #BF
0 LIFT$ 9 A M5AC+ ATTITUDE4 ,=A MO;T NEI
( U SPOKE4 ,X IS H>D 6SAY : 0 MO/
EXCIT$4
  8,Y DON'T M1N 6SAY T Y H ANY IDEA (!
M1N+ (! SCRAWL80
  8,I D10 0 MY DESP]ATE REPLY4 8,LOOK AT
! S5T;E Z DICTAT$ 0Y40
  8,WELL10 B X M1NS NO?+10 0 ! ANGRY
ANSW]4
  8,NO?+ IF Y R1D F LEFT 6"R1 B M>K1 IF
F "R 6LEFT-0
  8,BACKW>DS60 CRI$ MY UNCLE1 9 WILD
AMAZE;T4 8,OH MO/ CUNN+ ,SAKNUSSEMM2 &
,I 6BE S* A BLOCKH1D60
  ,HE SNAT*$ UP ! DOCU;T1 GAZ$ AT X )
HA7>D EYE1 & R1D X \ Z ,I _H D"O4
  ,X R1D Z FOLL[S3
  ,9 ,SNE6ELS ,YOCULIS CRAT]EM KEM
DELIBAT UMBRA ,SC>T>IS ,JULII 9TRA
CAL5DAS DESC5DE1 AUDAS VIATOR1 ET
T]RE/RE C5TRUM ATT+ES4 ,KOD FECI4 ,>NE
,SAKNUSSEMM
  ,: DOG ,LAT9 2+ TRANSLAT$1 R1DS Z
FOLL[S3  ,DESC5D 96! CRAT] ( ,YOCUL (       #BG
,SNE6ELS1 : ! %ADE ( ,SC>T>IS C>ESSES1
2F ! KAL5DS ( ,JULY1 AUDACI\S TRAVEL]1 &
Y W R1* ! C5T] (! E>?4 ,I DID X4
  ,,>NE ,,SAKNUSSEMM
  ,MY UNCLE L1P$ ?REE FEET F ! GR.D )
JOY4 ,HE LOOK$ RADIANT & H&"S4 ,HE RU%$
AB ! ROOM WILD ) DELI<T & SATISFAC;N4
,HE KNOCK$ OV] TA#S & *AIRS4 ,HE ?REW 8
BOOKS AB UNTIL AT LA/1 UTT]LY EXHAU/$1
HE FELL 96HIS >M*AIR4
  8,:AT'S O'C80 HE ASK$4
  8,AB ?REE40
  8,MY D9N] DOES N SEEM 6H D"O ME M*
GD10 HE OBS]V$4 8,LET ME H "S?+ 6EAT4
,WE C !N />T AT ONCE4 ,GET MY PORTMANT1U
R1DY40
  8,:AT =80
  8,& YR [N10 HE 3T9U$4 8,WE />T AT
ONCE40
  ,MY HORROR MAY 2 3CVD4 ,I RESOLV$ H["E
6%[ NO FE>4 ,SCI5TIFIC R1SONS 7 ! ONLY
"OS LIKELY 69FLU;E MY UNCLE4 ,N[1 "! 7
_M AG/ ? T]RI# J\RNEY4 ,! V IDEA ( GO+
D[N 6! C5T] (! E>? 0 SIMPLY ABSURD4 ,IDET]M9$ "!=E 6>GUE ! PO9T AF D9N]4   #BH
  ,MY UNCLE'S RAGE 0 N[ DIRECT$ AG/ !
COOK = HAV+ NO D9N] R1DY4 ,MY EXPLAN,N
H["E SATISFI$ HM1 & HAV+ GOTT5 ! KEY1 %E
SOON 3TRIV$ 6GET SU6ICI5T 6SATISFY \R
VORACI\S APPETITES4
  ,DUR+ ! REPA/ MY UNCLE 0 R GAY ?AN
O!RWISE4 ,HE MADE "S ( ^? PECULI> JOKES
: 2L;G EXCLUSIVELY 6! LE>N$4 ,Z SOON1
H["E1 Z DESS]T 0 OV]1 HE CALL$ ME 6HIS
/UDY4 ,WE EA* TOOK A *AIR ON OPPOSITE
SIDES (! TA#4
  8,H5RY10 HE SD1 9 A S(T & W9N+ VOICE2
8,I H ALW 2LIEV$ Y 9G5I\S1 & Y H R5D]$
ME A S]VICE N"E 6BE =GOTT54 ,)\T Y1 ?
GRT1 ? WONDR\S 4COV]Y WD N"E H BE5 MADE4
,X IS MY DUTY1 "!=E1 69SI/ ON YR %>+ !
GLORY40
  8,HE IS 9 A GD HUMOR10 ?"\ ,I2 8,I'LL
SOON LET HM "K MY OP9ION ( GLORY40
  8,IN ! F/ PLACE10 HE 3T9U$1 8Y M/ KEEP
! :OLE A6AIR A PROF.D SECRET4 ,"! IS NO
M 5VI\S RACE ( M5 ?AN SCI5TIFIC 4COV]]S4
,_M WD />T ON ! SAME J\RNEY4 ,AT ALL
EV5TS1 WE W 2 ! F/ 9 ! FIELD40  8,I D\BT YR HAV+ _M -PETITORS10    #BI
0 MY REPLY4
  8,A MAN ( R1L SCI5TIFIC ACQUIRE;TS WD
2 DELI<T$ AT ! *.E4 ,WE %D F9D A P]FECT
/R1M ( PILGRIMS ON ! TRACES ( ,>NE
,SAKNUSSEMM1 IF ? DOCU;T 7 ONCE MADE
PUBLIC40
  8,B1 MY DE> SIR1 IS N ? PAP] V LIKELY
6BE A HOAX80 ,I URG$4
  8,! BOOK 9 : WE F9D X IS SU6ICI5T PRO(
( XS AU!NTIC;Y10 HE REPLI$4
  8,I ?OR\<LY ALL[ T ! CELEBRAT$
,PROFESSOR WROTE ! L9ES1 B ONLY1 ,I
2LIEVE1 Z A K9D ( MY/IFIC,N10 0 MY
ANSW]4
  ,SC>CELY 7 ! ^WS \ ( MY M\?1 :5 ,I 0
SORRY ,I _H UTT]$ !M4 ,MY UNCLE LOOK$ AT
ME )A D>K & GLOOMY SC[L1 & ,I 2GAN 6BE
AL>M$ =! RESULTS ( \R 3V]S,N4 ,8 MOOD
SOON *ANG$1 H["E1 &A SMILE TOOK ! PLACE
(A FR[N4
  8,WE % SEE10 HE REM>K$1 ) DECISIVE
EMPHASIS4
  8,B SEE1 :AT IS ALL ? AB ,YOCUL1 &
,SNE6ELS1 & ? ,SC>T>IS8 ,I H N"E HE>DANY?+ AB !M40                        #CJ
  8,! V PO9T 6: ,I AM -+4 ,I LATELY RCVD
F MY FR ,AUGU/US ,PET]MAN1 ( ,LEIPZIG1 A
MAP4 ,TAKE D[N ! ?IRD ATLAS F ! SECOND
%ELF1 S]IES ;,Z1 PLATE #D40
  ,I ROSE1 W5T 6! %ELF1 & PRES5TLY
RETURN$ )! VOLUME 9DICAT$4
  8,?10 SD MY UNCLE1 8IS "O (! BE/ MAPS
( ,ICEL&4 ,I 2LIEVE X W SETTLE ALL YR
D\BTS1 DI6ICULTIES & OBJEC;NS40
  ,)A GRIM HOPE 6! 3TR>Y1 ,I /OOP$ OV] !
MAP4

